Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Moms and Porn? Time for a Heart Check (Part One)

Porn and Purity, Christian Education by Rebecca Ingram Powell
Click on the button to view all my Porn and Purity articles!

I don't want to be afraid to tackle the tough issues in the Mom Seriously series on Porn and Purity. In tackling topics like helping our sons avoid porn and counseling our daughters to dress modestly, I have to keep returning to what I think is the crux of authentic Christian parenting: setting a godly example.

For many moms, setting an example regarding these two particular issues--pornography and modesty--are no-brainers. They are not attracted to the lures of what most would consider to be porn (by a standard definition), and they are modest in their dress. But today, I want to offer up a heart check that may have you rethinking some of the decisions you make regarding your entertainment choices.

"There is a form of pornography that many women are involved in, and they don’t even realize it," says Dr. Tim Kimmel, author of the beloved Christian classic, Little House on the Freeway: Help for the Hurried Home, as well as one of my favorite titles, Raising Kids for True Greatness: Redefine Success for You and Your Child. "They would get so upset if their husband looked at Penthouse magazine, but they have no problem making sure that they stop in on Wysteria Lane every week and see how the 'desperate housewives' are doing."

According to Dr. Kimmel, the reason that shows like Desperate Housewives or Sex In The City (and the movies that followed the series) were watched religiously by women is because they play right into women's fantasies. "And it is fantasy, or pornography, even when it is not so much visual images of naked bodies, but it is playing into a story that isn't theirs," he explains. "And oh, you can't help but play the comparison game when it's done."

The Comparison Game. You know that one, don't you? I do. And I would say that we have all been guilty of playing it at some time or another. With guns blazing, it wreaks havoc on a contented spirit and healthy, Christ-centered relationships. Interestingly enough, it doesn't have to be something as crass as Desperate Housewives or a daily soap opera--even a Christian romance novel can invite women to cross the line into a fantasy world, inviting them to question all that God has given them in their husbands and homes.

What to do? Dr. Kimmel recommends this heart check when evaluating your current entertainment/media choices:

  • After watching this show (or viewing this movie, visiting this site, reading this book) am I more excited about my role as a wife and mother, or less?
  • Am I more committed to shining for the Lord in the kind of environment that I just saw portrayed, or less?
  • Has this show caused me in any way to play the comparison game with people up close to me, like my husband?
  • And if my husband is falling short in the comparison game after watching this show, how could this possibly be in the best interest of my marriage?

Authentic Christian parenting...no one ever said it would be easy. God's blessings on you today as you stay committed to mom seriously.


Rebecca
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1 comment:

Dielle said...

I love this question: "After watching this show (or viewing this movie, visiting this site, reading this book) am I more excited about my role as a wife and mother, or less?" I also try to think how I would feel watching or reading something if Christ were sitting next to me. If I'd be embarassed, it's a good signal that I should turn it off or throw it out.

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