Mom Seriously: Avoiding a Crumpled, Critical, Cliqued-Out Daughter

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Remember middle school? The cliques formed amazingly fast! Life morphed from playing with Barbie dolls to feeling pressured to look like one. Suddenly, a girl’s social status rests on her physical development and ability to attract the opposite sex. Even young girls can get hung up on outward beauty and feel compelled to pursue it, neglecting the makeover that needs to occur in their hearts.

At some point, we all long to be the prettiest girl in the room. But if a girl is only pretty on the outside, she is as one-dimensional as a model in a magazine ad: flat, lifeless, and easily crumpled. Makeup can conceal blemishes and braces can straighten teeth, but the only way to have a beautiful heart is to invite the Master of the Makeover, Jesus Christ, to do a work on the inside, where it counts.

The next several years are critical as you shield your daughter from the enemy’s lies and show your daughter who God says she is. Psalm 139 explains in beautiful language that she is fearfully and wonderfully made! She is one of a kind! God knows her story. His love does not balance on her appearance or her actions. It rests on the simple fact that He is the lover of her soul. She has managed to fascinate the Most High God without even knowing it!

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Hey Mom, did you know this is a truth that applies to you, too? And if you don't accept it, embracing it wholeheartedly, then she might not either.

If we can point our girls to the truth of God’s love for them, they will be transformed into a channel of His love. It will be natural for them to share His love with others, even those who are unkind and hurtful toward them. Christ’s love conquered death. It can conquer cliques, too.

Quick Tips:

Avoid cliques by encouraging diverse friendships and group activities.
Best friends are nearly essential at this age, but help your daughter keep her eyes and heart open to those girls who are consistently left out of the loop.
Show your daughter, by example, an attitude of "Others First."
Pump up her self-esteem by affirming her with your positive words, listening ear, and open heart.
Encourage her faith and remind her that she is a priceless treasure to the One who made her.