HOPE TO BE HEARD

Kids try so hard to be cool.

I teach a weekly writing class to teens, and I know that not much has changed between my years as a teenager and theirs. Of course, technology has changed everything, but the need to be approved, accepted, and admired by the ol' peer group is still something most teenagers are after. One thing I notice today that I didn't realize so much when I was a teen is that the kids who are trying the hardest to say, "I'm an individual. I don't fit in and I don't want to fit in," are the ones who are the most desperate to be accepted! Rather than struggle with it, they just opt to be mavericks and console themselves with the mantra above. :) What ends up happening, however, is that they sabotage themselves with the very "coolness" they are trying to portray. Because they are not being themselves, they come off as fake, unfriendly, difficult people. And that distances other people from them. So, rather than investing in close personal relationships where they can know and be known, they create an invisible shield that basically invites people to leave them alone!

Truthfully, every person has a story. And most every person wants his story told--and listened to. The older I get, the more I think people are screaming their stories at us, but we don't hear them.

Maclain (not his real name) was a student of mine who had a story. He didn't share it, and no one else in our class knew his story. But I knew, and I saw him telling his story every day in the way he acted--the way he expressed and presented himself. Just 14, he needed to tell it. And he needed to be heard. But most of the other students in my class didn't pay much attention. Immersed in their own dramas (that hasn't changed!), they were too self-absorbed to notice his. When he skirted the very edge of our conservative dress code, no one paid attention. When he didn't participate in group activities, no one cared. He was simply dismissed, overlooked, and worst of all, ignored. Now, in truth, no one openly mistreated him, and he had plenty of friends outside the class. In fact, he was one of my favorite students, ripe with talent and, underneath all the black clothes, a heart of gold. But there was so much to him--so much there to know and understand and become acquainted with--so much not to dismiss.

Toward the end of the school year, I gave my students an assignment of writing a devotional. The devotionals were read aloud the following week. I had no idea what they would come up with, but we prayed that day before we got started with class, and I reminded the students how important it was to be respectful of each other. As each student began to read what he or she had written, hearts were opened and laid bare. I was astonished as each teen revealed dreams, desires, disappointments, and disgraces. I don't know if, as a high schooler, I could have or would have been willing to put myself out there like they did that day. And then, when I honestly didn't know if my heart could take anymore, in what can only be defined as a watershed moment for me and every student who was present that day, Maclain began to read the devotion he had written.

Through carefully crafted words, he told the story of his mother's death, just a few years before, from cancer. He told how he found out she was sick, of listening to her vomit and feeling his stomach tighten as he knew there was something terribly wrong. He told of the hospital, sterile and cold, so frightening to a boy not yet 12. Then he took the hearts already lain bare and he wrapped them in the story of the day when he was told that his dear mother had passed on--a day when he thought that the news would be just the opposite. Twice as he read, he paused to take long, loud, gasping breaths, like a swimmer who comes up for air before diving down to the depths again. As every eye remained fixed on him, and as every eye, both boys and girls, began to fill with tears, a hope filled the classroom. A hope that rested on Maclain's as he shared his knowledge of and relationship with Jesus Christ. A hope that parked on a God Who had just enabled the other students to see through new eyes. A hope that handed back our hearts now packaged in the certainty that we would walk away with our focus turned outward rather than inward.

With just a few weeks left in class, I saw things change, but not because of pity. Things changed because a group of teenagers learned that people are not always as they appear. In fact, they are hardly ever so. This hope-filled moment came about when someone who needed to be heard found his voice, and when those around him listened with their hearts.

HERE'S TO HOPE!

Hi Everybody,

I'm going to do something that I think will be as fun for me to write as for you to read! I'm going to leave 2008 and enter 2009 with my Top Ten most hope-filled moments! I really want to share with you how God moved in so many ways over the past year, and I want to leap into the New Year riding on the thrill of that hopefulness!

The journey begins tomorrow! I hope you'll join me!

THANKFUL THURSDAY!

A note from Kelly today prompted me to want to touch base with everyone during this busy month. When I visited her blog, I saw that the "Thankful Thursday" meme was going strong, so I thought that would be something that I could share with y'all today. Here is what I'm thankful for on this busy day:

1. My parents and my in-laws. That we get to share another Christmas with these four wonderful people is just amazing to me. They are responsible for the rich Christian heritage my kids enjoy and embrace on a daily basis. They are active and involved in their lives, and they are the best grandparents any child could ever have. My kids have grown up knowing and loving them, and that is a blessing I am thankful for every day.

2. Basketball. Another season means more trial by fire as I strive (sometimes nightly, when the schedule is hectic!) to cheer for the team while keeping from pelting the mouthy parents in the stands. :) But anytime I am calling on the Lord, praying Scripture ("Where is the guard who is supposed to sit at the door of my mouth, Lord? Help!"), and seeking to be a channel of His Love rather than walking around in my flesh, that is a good thing. :) And I love what my boys, oblivious to the drama in the stands, are learning about sportsmanship, teamwork, and pressing in!

3. Girls seeking God. The Lord continues to open doors for girls' conferences! Danya and I have several scheduled for next year, and we are so excited to share Christ with those hearts! I'm thankful for people who accept the burden of taking on the administrating and organizing of such an event, all for the glory of God.

4. Warm ovens. When the oven is warm, it means something is going in it, or something has just come out of it. I love this season, when cooking for friends and family is a special delight!

5. Hope. At the end of last year, God placed a new hope in my heart that was so real--nearly tangible--and I have not let go of it. Hope for His people, His purposes, and His plans has been my mantra for the past 365 days. It's a song my heart cannot quit singing! In the face of the enemy, I have hope. Thanks be to God!

ELEVEN YEARS AGO TODAY

I was in college when I realized that I did, indeed, like middle schoolers. Oh, I had hated being one. But the semester that I thought I was going to go into education, I got to "observe" a middle school class for several weeks, and surprisingly enough, I really liked the kids! It was hard to believe.

Fast forward a few years, and I can tell you the time and the place when that like for middle schoolers turned into love. I was teaching VBS in Paducah, KY, at Olivet Baptist Church. No one else would teach the 5th and 6th graders, and because I had checked the box that indicated I would work wherever needed, I was immediately relegated to the dark side....the fifth and sixth graders.

And I loved them!

They were bright, energetic, spontaneous, and eager to see if and how God's Word applied to their lives. We had a great week together. The highlight for me was introducing a precious girl named Mackenzie to Jesus Christ. I led her in prayer as she received Him as her Lord. There were also twin sisters in my class that summer, Mandy and Missy Jenkins. Adorable. It was just a couple of months later that my husband and I moved our family to Nashville. But I never forgot those kids or the week we spent together.

Fast forward a few more years, and on the morning of December 1, 1997 (eleven years ago today), I received a phone call from Bryan, then the youth pastor at Olivet. He explained that there had been a shooting at Heath High School. A kid had opened fire on the school's morning prayer group. This group was a tradition at Heath. They met daily in the lobby for a few minutes of prayer before the bells rang to start the school day. Some of Bryan's youth, many of them kids I had in VBS, were a part of that prayer group. He was on his way to the scene and asked me to begin praying.

I turned on CNN as reports of the shooting were already making their way to the nation's news desk. Within a couple of hours, I learned that three students had been killed that day, and five were wounded. Some of our Olivet kids were among the physically wounded. And several of them were wounded emotionally in an incident that will forever be a part of who they are.

Missy Jenkins was wounded, paralyzed from the chest down eleven years ago today. She has written a book about her experience called, "I Choose to Be Happy." It's available at amazon.com and it's an amazing read. I caught up with Missy to do a story for HomeLife magazine that will be out in the Spring. You'll see Missy's lovely face on the cover. Although her life was unalterably changed 11 years ago, Missy's choice to forgive the shooter rather than dwell in bitterness has given her the freedom to focus on recovery, restoration, and God's re-direction of her life. Her attitude, determination, and grateful heart provide a lesson for all of us.

When I hear little girls talk about their heroes, mentioning Miley Cyrus or some other Disney star, I just want to ask them, Have you ever heard of Missy Jenkins? 'cause she is one of my old friends, and one of my new heroes.

In memory of the girls who lost their lives
and in honor of the teens who lost their innocence
December 1, 1997, Heath High School